June 20, 2013

You go day after day, month after month, and you try and try to get the best care for them and make them happy, etc. and fight the battles and nothing changes and it feels so hopeless and so futile.  You talk to all the nurses and caregivers and staff and plead and point out problems and then you call the doctor and talk it all over with him and they all agree to one thing and then nothing gets carried out. AND on top of it all the patient fucks with your head. Today is just the latest example; she said she wanted to get up so I told her to push the call button and I stayed and made sue it came on. Then when the CNA arrived they asked me “what?”. I said she told me she wants to get up. They looked at mom and mom said “Just kidding”. WTF. What an asshole. I apologized to the CNA and told mom goodbye, So the CNA started to tell me that she does this kind of shit all the time. I just put my hand up. I don’t want to hear it, I KNOW it.  I don’t want to ever go see her again. So what kind of sick, selfish, person am I?